


No Small Talk

by poorboxershorts



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Alcohol abuse mention, Based off Robert's good end, Cryptid Hunting, Cryptids, Fluff, Ghosts, Idk how to tag things, M/M, date, i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-05 18:03:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11583360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poorboxershorts/pseuds/poorboxershorts
Summary: Date with the man, the mystery, the dad just trying to get better.





	No Small Talk

**Author's Note:**

> hi I'm so infatuated and invested in this guy and you know what I'm gonna give him the justice he deserves, which is writing terribly and try making his character not about mothman jokes. find new cryptids y'all Robert thinks mothmans bullshit anyway

It's been a good while since I'd genuinely spent quality time with Robert. Of course there was Joseph's multiple banquets each week but those got steadily boring, and Joseph's chipper attitude gave me more creeps than the Dover Ghost. Eventually I decided to stop going to the events entirely unless I was lonely for Amanda, or Robert decided to have a cheat day and mooch off the Christiansen's high dollar whiskey. 

Fortunately from what I know, Robert hasn't really drank unless I'm around or another dad is keeping an eye on him. Which is great, since he'd swore to improve for Val and the both of us. On the flip side, Robert's kept himself a little more distant than I'd prefer, but he protests that it's for the good of our relationship. 

I think of all this as I chat with Amanda on the phone, she's doing fine in school, which I expected, I'd raised her to do the best. While she goes on about a particularly hard assignment, I receive a text from Robert. My face lights up. "Manda, my blood, my world, my only daughter, I'm so sorry but I've got a text from Robert. You know Dad tip 36 is to never leave a bro hanging."  
I hear Amanda groan on the line, "yea okay dad, go hang out with your boyfriend. Tell Bobert I said hey." I roll my eyes. "Will do, I love you Manda Panda." 

After our goodbyes, I hang up and see the text from Robert. He explains in explicit detail that he's positive that he's found Chupacabra footprints by his brooding bench. I sigh and reply, telling him that those are probably Betsy tracks or someone else's dog. I then get a call from him, I answer, my voice monotone. "Robert I thought you were smarter than this, you know that the chupacabra isn't native to the U.S-"  
He interrupts me, "wrong, all have you know that recently there have been nine chupacabra sightings in Maple Bay, and I'm determined to catch it. I distinctly have smelled goats on the trail, and seen fur on tree limbs, the bastard monster dog leaves far too much evidence." 

I'm positive he's joking but the edge on his voice makes me think otherwise. "You're fibbing." Robert chuckles. "You're right-" he pauses. "Or are you?" 

I scoff. "Listen if you wanted to hang out with me you just had to blatantly ask." I can feel the power of Robert's eyeroll from my couch. "Yea but it's no fun that way. Whatever I'm waiting outside right now, and I think I'm gonna try and face the Dover Ghost again." I get up and put on my tennis shoes, the phone still nestled between my shoulder and my ear. "No chupacabra, no cigar, sorry Rob but I've gotta call a raincheck." I hear Robert honk as I'm about to hang up the phone. "You're talking as if I can't see you getting ready through your window."

I laugh before hitting the hang up button. 

Soon enough I'm in Robert's truck, and on instinct I roll the window down. It's kind of awkward as Robert and I sit in silence, but it's better than trying to make small talk while cranking a lever to just get a window down. Once I'm done, I look back at Robert. "Hey," he says, taking a long drag of a cigarette. "Hi, and another hi from Amanda," I reply, putting my arm out the window. "How's she doing?" Robert asks me while flicking away his cigarette then beginning to drive out the cul-de-sac. 

"She's fine, although I've haven't heard her complain so much since she was seven." Robert grunts in response. "You can be too critical, I mean at least she genuinely talks to you. Sure Val and I are gettin' better, but it's hard to get beyond just how are you and shit. You know how much I fuckin' hate useless banter." I nod to him in response. Then, in a matter of seconds, my body jerks forward as Robert slams the break. I really wished I practiced what I preached and wore a goddamn seatbelt. 

"Did you see that?" Robert asks me, his arm instinctually over me so I don't fall out my seat. It's endearing, but we're both too on edge to notice. "Yeah, what was that?" we both notice something in the distance, and before we can decipher what it is, Robert puts the truck in park and jumps out. I see him unsheathe his pocket knife and crouch near the brush up ahead. He looks ridiculous but I find myself right behind him. 

We stalk around for a bit before we hear a faint crush of leaves ahead, and soon enough, Robert sprints forward and jumps into a bush. I'm scared but I can't help to laugh. I freeze, then wait while I hear grunting and shuffling among the bushes. Robert pops up out of the bush, a few scratches along his cheek. I carefully walk up to him, concerned. "Robert! Are you okay?" I ask as he climbs out of the brush and makes his way back to the truck. "I'm fine, turns out it was just a deer. I think." I put my face in my hands as a response. 

Later, Robert and I call it quits on cryptid hunting after uncovering another deer and two raccoons. No sign of the Dover Ghost or anything paranormal for that matter. We're back where we went on our second date, sitting on the tailgate of Robert's truck in the clearing, looking over the lights of Maple Bay. "How are things going with recovery? Besides calling Val." Robert shrugs. "Better. I wake up before two and I feed Betsy instead of feeding my alcohol addiction, so that's a plus. I've been tryin to convince Mary to go to rehab with me, but she tells me that drinking is the only way she can deal with Joseph, and I genuinely understand that so I'm not gonna bother her anymore until she's ready." 

I'm not sure if I should laugh or not so I just suppress and nod again. 

"Well, that's great. I'm really happy for you. I'm glad you've cleaned yourself up to go from grade A piece of shit to tolerable douchebag." I say this lightheartedly and rest my head on Robert's shoulder. His jacket smells a bit like lilac and I think that's when I really notice his change. He seems more loose and content. Genuinely loose, not some sort of poor facade to hide his degrading nature and internalized self hatred. 

"Thank you, but I think I deserve more props, I shaved a little too yesterday." Robert tells me, looking up to show me his decently shaved neck and sideburns. "Bravo." I say, nuzzling his shoulder and smiling against it. Then on no words are spoken, we look out to the city, teensy cracked smiles on our tranquil faces.

No small talk, no worries.


End file.
